Retrofit Brings New Life to Old Industrial Park

Published July 31, 2008

Where's the skepticism?

Your readers would be better served if you approached this and other stories with at least a dash of skepticism. Instead, this reads like a press release. This sentence, for example, couldn't have been better crafted by a PR professional:

"When yesterday's visitors conceded that all some could smell was the pleasant, but distant aroma of a gourmet, high-fiber, low-cal, mostly green, heart-healthy lunch being prepared, Lin smiled."

There has to be some point in this story on which you could provide an opposing view. If not, at least use language that doesn't make readers think you've been paid by the city of San Jose to reprint their marketing material.

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